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Things Kids Say

From the Mind of a Six-Year Old

As summer ends and fall begins, my family has many special occasions to celebrate. My wedding anniversary and my 2-year old son X’s birthday have just passed and now it’s time to celebrate my son, N’s turning six. N is a precocious child who keeps my wife, KayEm, and I laughing and scratching our heads [...]

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On Purpose Accident

One day, my wife, KayEm, called me at work to inform me that I needed to talk to my 5-year-old son, N. Whenever I need to talk to a child, one of three things has occurred: 1. The child is sad/disappointed and needs some encouragement 2. The child misses me because I’m away on business [...]

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Dirty Diapers and the Male Anatomy

As I was in the midst of changing my 1-year-old son’s malodorous diaper, my 8-year-old daughter, Nee, walked in and asked, “What’cha doin’?” I intended to say, “I’m being poisoned by killer baby poop.” Instead, I said, “I’m changing X’s diaper. Would you care to help?” “No,” she said. “I can’t change his diaper.” “Why [...]

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And God Created Cherries

When I got home the other day, I was famished. Luckily, there was a huge bowl of sweet, juicy cherries waiting to be devoured. As I tried to enjoy my bounty, I was interrupted by two little interlopers. “Daddy!” screamed my 8-year-old daughter, Nee. “What are you doing?” “I’m eating cherries,” I said. “What does [...]

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Car Conversations

Houston is a huge city; therefore, we spend many hours in our car driving around town. During these drives, I’m often entertained by my children’s conversations. Sometimes my 5-year-old son, N, pummels me with a barrage of “What would happen if” questions; other times, my 8-year-old daughter, Nee, surprises me with her wit and wisdom. [...]

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Father’s Day 2009: The Day I Became a Father

Being a father is the most rewarding and challenging job a man can have. God blessed me with my first child eight years ago. I was frightened and inexperienced and stumbled through the first few months until I gained my bearings. Since then, my wife, KayEm, and I have had two more children and I [...]

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What Would Happen If…

My five-year-old son, N, is so inquisitive. He bombards me with a constant barrage of questions when we’re riding in the car. If not for Google, my son might think I’m an idiot. As it stands, he thinks I’m the most brilliant man alive. However, he does come up with some questions that even the [...]

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Talking About Alcohol

My wife, K, and I had to have a talk about alcohol with our 8-year-old daughter, Nee. We realized that Nee was quite naïve about the topic after she attended a wedding reception. While waiting in line to get some hors d’oeuvres, Nee noticed another line and asked K what the people were waiting for. [...]

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Fatherhood Fragments: Featuring Nee

At school, Nee was assigned a project to develop a new product. My budding marketing genius came up with Flight Sprite. One drink will give you incredible power to soar the skies like an eagle. I can’t wait until it’s in production. *  *  *  *  *  *  * Nee came running down the stairs [...]

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99 Cups of Kool-Aid

While driving in the car with my children, Nee and N, I broke into a rousing rendition of “99 Cups of Kool-Aid (sung to the tune of 99 Bottles of Beer).” Around the 96th cup, N joined in to form a gleeful duo. N and I were having a grand ole time, but Nee was [...]

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Sasha Obama’s Biggest Fan

As I’ve mentioned before, my seven year old daughter, Nee, loves Barack Obama and his family. She jumped at the opportunity when her teacher asked her class to write letters to the new president. Here is what she wrote: Dear President Obama, My whole family has been squealing since the election on Tuesday. I’m really [...]

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Martin Luther the King

The other day, my daughter, Nee, who is in second grade, was complaining to my wife, K, that her school has shown the same documentary on Martin Luther King, Jr. since she was in kindergarten. Nee attends a private Christian school that has an African-American population of about 2%. We worry about the diversity of [...]

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Pickles Lead to the Poor House

Pickles are the real harbingers of financial doom. My in-laws discovered this shocking fact as they attempted to have lunch at my house. My son happened to walk into the kitchen as my mother-in-law was placing pickles on a sandwich. “G-Mom,” he yelled. “Don’t eat all of those pickles. My dad will be so mad [...]

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My Son Meets a Missionary

My wife and I always encourage our children to help others. We model the behavior by serving in our church, volunteering at the homeless shelter, or delivering meals to people who cannot leave their homes. We also like introduce them to other people who make service a priority. One evening, we invited a missionary to [...]

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I Heard It From God

I have a bad habit of not fastening my seat belt until I’ve driven a few blocks down the road. This behavior drives my five year old son nuts. Last night, he was fed up and gave me a piece of his mind. “Daddy,” he said. “You didn’t put on your seat belt before you [...]

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