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Hair Styling is No Job for Daddies

Don't touch my hair, Daddy!

Don't touch my hair, Daddy!

My daughter, Nee, has absolutely no confidence in my ability to do her hair. Whenever I attempt to style it, she becomes more obnoxious than a talk radio host.

Recently, my wife, KayEm, had to run an errand and I thought I would surprise her by combing and styling Nee’s hair (even though Nee prefers KayEm to do her hair, it’s not a pleasant experience for either party. If you’ve ever bathed a cat, you can understand how these styling sessions go).

I gathered all of the tools and materials and set-up a styling station in the kitchen. “Nee,” I said. “Come and sit down so Daddy can do your hair.” A look of horror covered her face.

“No!” she yelled. “You’re NOT doing my hair.”

“C’mon,” I said. “Daddy, can do it. I’ll make you look beautiful.”

“NO!” she yelled again. “I want Mommy to do my hair.”

“But Mommy’s gone to climb Everest and won’t be back for three months,” I said.

“I’ll wait,” she said, as she crossed her arms and dug her heels into the ceramic tile.

When Nee was younger and couldn’t voice objections, I did her hair periodically. Although I had absolutely no experience, I think I managed to make her look presentable. I always stuck with my two default hairstyles: Afro with a head band, or one single pony tail. Whenever I tried to get fancy, it was a disaster. Nee wound up with crooked parts down the middle of her head and two lopsided ponytails. Who knows what would have happened if I had attempted three.

Because of my hairstyling shortcomings, KayEm relieved me of this duty. “I’ll handle Nee’s hair from now on,” she told me. “You just take care of the boys.”

“What’s wrong with the way I do her hair?” I asked. She smiled and gently patted me on the back.

“You just take care of the boys’ hair,” she repeated.

“Give me one reason why I can’t do her hair”, I insisted.

KayEm sighed and shook her head before saying, “Because I don’t want my daughter going out looking crazy.”

“She’s my daughter, too,” I protested. “I would never let my little princess look crazy in public.”

“You’re right. She is your daughter too, so we’ll let her decide,” said KayEm as she beckoned Nee over to us. “Who do you want to do your hair? Mommy or Daddy?”

“Mommy!” she said instantly.

I was hurt. My little princess had rejected me in favor of cute hairstyles.

Nee is in third grade now, and I know that things such as hairstyles and fashion are much more important to her. In her world, it’s uncool to wear daddy-inspired hairstyles. I know my baby is growing up, but I miss the days when a single ponytail was good enough.

Stay Strong,

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Questions: Dads, how often you style your daughters’ hair? Moms, under what circumstances do you allow your husbands to style your daughters’ hair.


Popularity: 2% [?]

  • http://www.carmasez.com carma

    I see we have the same level of hairstyling expertise. I thank my lucky stars that I had a boy, because I am completely clueless on lots of this girly stuff. Nee would have fired me as well, if that is any consolation :D

  • http://www.carmasez.com carma

    I see we have the same level of hairstyling expertise. I thank my lucky stars that I had a boy, because I am completely clueless on lots of this girly stuff. Nee would have fired me as well, if that is any consolation :D

  • http://www.boardinginbedlam.blogspot.com Arby

    One pony tail is the max of my girl-hair styling skills. If my daughter’s hair is any fancier it means that it is either the weekend or her mother was home from work that day.

  • http://www.boardinginbedlam.blogspot.com Arby

    One pony tail is the max of my girl-hair styling skills. If my daughter’s hair is any fancier it means that it is either the weekend or her mother was home from work that day.

  • http://www.momfiles.com Sheliza

    Aww, what a nice try, but sorry dad, moms are way better hair doers :) The days of when just a ponytail is good enough does not last very long. My daughters used to shriek when their dad asked to do their hair! It’s a girl thing :)

  • http://www.momfiles.com Sheliza

    Aww, what a nice try, but sorry dad, moms are way better hair doers :) The days of when just a ponytail is good enough does not last very long. My daughters used to shriek when their dad asked to do their hair! It’s a girl thing :)

  • Tyrone

    I will be forwarding this post to my wife who thinks that I should be styling our daughter’s hair. I abstain for the same reasons.

  • Tyrone

    I will be forwarding this post to my wife who thinks that I should be styling our daughter’s hair. I abstain for the same reasons.

  • http://joanofalltrades.blogspot.com joanofalltrades

    I truly admire you for even wanting to tackle the task of doing a little girl’s hair. Most dads would run the other way. I don’t ever remember my dad touching my hair. I am secretly praying that I have a boy because my poor daughter’s hair will look crazy. I have never been able to do hair. Keep hope alive! She’ll appreciate your efforts one day.

  • http://joanofalltrades.blogspot.com joanofalltrades

    I truly admire you for even wanting to tackle the task of doing a little girl’s hair. Most dads would run the other way. I don’t ever remember my dad touching my hair. I am secretly praying that I have a boy because my poor daughter’s hair will look crazy. I have never been able to do hair. Keep hope alive! She’ll appreciate your efforts one day.

  • http://www.michellesblessedlife.blogspot.com Michelle

    Awww, poor dads. Luckily, I don’t have that problem since I only have boys! But I think my hubby would be the same way.

  • http://www.michellesblessedlife.blogspot.com Michelle

    Awww, poor dads. Luckily, I don’t have that problem since I only have boys! But I think my hubby would be the same way.

  • http://www.ChocolateBrides.Com Kesha

    LOL! I just love this blog! Thanks for making me smile. Can’t wait to share this post with my community of Chocolate Moms.

  • http://www.ChocolateBrides.Com Kesha

    LOL! I just love this blog! Thanks for making me smile. Can’t wait to share this post with my community of Chocolate Moms.

  • http://mommyimhome.com Karen

    My daughter is also in 3rd grade and about the time she started preschool she realized that dad just doesn’t do her hair like mom does. Dad never quite figured out that it helps to wet down the bed head in the morning. Now, of course, she’s old enough to brush out her own hair, but she still comes to me every morning to make sure the part is straight.

    BTW, thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting. Hope you keep coming back.

  • http://mommyimhome.com Karen

    My daughter is also in 3rd grade and about the time she started preschool she realized that dad just doesn’t do her hair like mom does. Dad never quite figured out that it helps to wet down the bed head in the morning. Now, of course, she’s old enough to brush out her own hair, but she still comes to me every morning to make sure the part is straight.

    BTW, thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting. Hope you keep coming back.

  • http://worldofweasels.blogspot.com WeaselMomma

    Don’t fret. My husband can’t do our girls hair very well either. Mainly because he has man hair and never learned girl hair through the course of his life. I can do my girls hair, but I am sure that you could do your daughters hair better than I could. Once again lack of life long experience and knowledge.

  • http://worldofweasels.blogspot.com WeaselMomma

    Don’t fret. My husband can’t do our girls hair very well either. Mainly because he has man hair and never learned girl hair through the course of his life. I can do my girls hair, but I am sure that you could do your daughters hair better than I could. Once again lack of life long experience and knowledge.

  • http://thesuburbanscrawl.blogspot.com Melisa

    I loved this post!

    Did you ever see Joeprah’s video on how he does his girls’ hair? He and Mr. Lady had a “competition” once; they both did videos and the readers judged who was better at it. Good stuff!

    P.S. I don’t have daughters, so it’s not an issue here. :)

  • http://thesuburbanscrawl.blogspot.com Melisa

    I loved this post!

    Did you ever see Joeprah’s video on how he does his girls’ hair? He and Mr. Lady had a “competition” once; they both did videos and the readers judged who was better at it. Good stuff!

    P.S. I don’t have daughters, so it’s not an issue here. :)

  • http://www.rockanddrool.com melissa

    Put the brush and pony tail holders down. Now!

  • http://www.rockanddrool.com melissa

    Put the brush and pony tail holders down. Now!

  • http://wewillnevergrowup.blogspot.com/ Caylee

    When I was in elementary school, my mom was sometimes out of town for weeks at a time. This led to some terrible hair experiences with my dad. I’ll give it to him though… he genuinely tried. Usually it was just a ponytail or a half-up/half-down style, but no matter what, it looked crooked and messy. I would literally cry when he finished! Looking back on the experiences though, I now laugh when I think of it, and I’m happy that my dad was sweet enough to try.

  • http://wewillnevergrowup.blogspot.com/ Caylee

    When I was in elementary school, my mom was sometimes out of town for weeks at a time. This led to some terrible hair experiences with my dad. I’ll give it to him though… he genuinely tried. Usually it was just a ponytail or a half-up/half-down style, but no matter what, it looked crooked and messy. I would literally cry when he finished! Looking back on the experiences though, I now laugh when I think of it, and I’m happy that my dad was sweet enough to try.

  • http://dani-findingmyniche.blogspot.com Daenel

    Um, yeah, when my girls were little I found out that my husband used to drive the girls over to my mother-in-law’s so she could do their hair for him. I was a little peeved – that’s cheating! His answer: “You can’t tell me how to do it, just as long as it gets done.”

  • http://dani-findingmyniche.blogspot.com Daenel

    Um, yeah, when my girls were little I found out that my husband used to drive the girls over to my mother-in-law’s so she could do their hair for him. I was a little peeved – that’s cheating! His answer: “You can’t tell me how to do it, just as long as it gets done.”

  • http://dadunmasked.com/ DadUnmasked

    Wow, I can totally relate. My oldest has resorted to doing her on hair when Mommy is not around and my youngest will only let me condition her hair. She lets her sister put in the pony tail holders because “Daddy’s too rough.”

  • http://dadunmasked.com/ DadUnmasked

    Wow, I can totally relate. My oldest has resorted to doing her on hair when Mommy is not around and my youngest will only let me condition her hair. She lets her sister put in the pony tail holders because “Daddy’s too rough.”

  • Glen

    Fred you need to practice on something. My 6th grader will let me part her hair if her mom is gone. I did it all the time when she was little. She is very gracious. Her mom is much better and faster than me.
    Great post.

  • Glen

    Fred you need to practice on something. My 6th grader will let me part her hair if her mom is gone. I did it all the time when she was little. She is very gracious. Her mom is much better and faster than me.
    Great post.

  • http://www.beingmichaelsdaddy.com Tom

    As Obi Wan would say, “this is a fight you cannot win.” If I were in your shoes, I’d just let this one go and focus on making sure she keeps her car’s oil changed (once she’s driving, of course). I used to get the grief from my daughters whenever I’d try to touch their hair, back before they could do anything like that for themselves.

  • http://www.beingmichaelsdaddy.com Tom

    As Obi Wan would say, “this is a fight you cannot win.” If I were in your shoes, I’d just let this one go and focus on making sure she keeps her car’s oil changed (once she’s driving, of course). I used to get the grief from my daughters whenever I’d try to touch their hair, back before they could do anything like that for themselves.

  • http://www.momy4him.typepad.com Lisa

    even I have a hard time doing my girls’ hair! i have to give you credit for even wanting to try, i don’t think my husband would even know what to do with a brush!

  • http://www.momy4him.typepad.com Lisa

    even I have a hard time doing my girls’ hair! i have to give you credit for even wanting to try, i don’t think my husband would even know what to do with a brush!

  • http://adventuresofadivamom.com DivaMom

    At least you try. ‘A’ for effort. Honestly, lots of moms don’t know how to comb their girls’ hair. It is something that comes from practice. Just like anything else, the more you do it the better you get.

    I have boys and I don’t like taking them to the barber shop.

  • http://adventuresofadivamom.com DivaMom

    At least you try. ‘A’ for effort. Honestly, lots of moms don’t know how to comb their girls’ hair. It is something that comes from practice. Just like anything else, the more you do it the better you get.

    I have boys and I don’t like taking them to the barber shop.

  • http://getofftheground.blogspot.com/ Kevin W. Grossman

    You are one brave daddy. I have a hard enough time brushing my own hair much less Bea’s.

  • http://getofftheground.blogspot.com/ Kevin W. Grossman

    You are one brave daddy. I have a hard enough time brushing my own hair much less Bea’s.

  • http://thedevoteddad.com Jason @ The Devoted Dad

    I too style my daughters hair, if styling is to move her hair around and take out the tangles. The pony tail is my favorite. Mostly because I am able to get her hair out of her face and also to show off her cute ears. My daughter does prefer her mom because the tangles come out easier, so she says.

  • http://thedevoteddad.com Jason @ The Devoted Dad

    I too style my daughters hair, if styling is to move her hair around and take out the tangles. The pony tail is my favorite. Mostly because I am able to get her hair out of her face and also to show off her cute ears. My daughter does prefer her mom because the tangles come out easier, so she says.

  • http://joytotheblog.blogspot.com joy

    Back in the day when our kids were small my husband could pull of a decent ponytail if he had to.

  • http://joytotheblog.blogspot.com joy

    Back in the day when our kids were small my husband could pull of a decent ponytail if he had to.

  • http://www.execumama.blogspot.com Execumama

    Loved this one so much I had to RT! My 3 yr old gives me the same flack, and I’m the hair comber in the house! What gives?!

  • http://www.execumama.blogspot.com Execumama

    Loved this one so much I had to RT! My 3 yr old gives me the same flack, and I’m the hair comber in the house! What gives?!

  • http://kmrsmr.blogspot.com Typ0

    I still let my dad do my hair when i’m home. He’s trimmed my hair for me since i was kid. (No styling allowed tho!)

  • http://kmrsmr.blogspot.com Typ0

    I still let my dad do my hair when i’m home. He’s trimmed my hair for me since i was kid. (No styling allowed tho!)

  • http://momstart.com Louise

    I do think dads get the rough from kids, esp girls when it comes to getting ready, but they handle it just fine. My dad raised me by himself for five years

  • http://momstart.com Louise

    I do think dads get the rough from kids, esp girls when it comes to getting ready, but they handle it just fine. My dad raised me by himself for five years

  • http://www.mytrendytykes.com Linda @ My Trendy Tykes

    Step away from the hairbrush, dad!

    LOL!!

  • http://www.mytrendytykes.com Linda @ My Trendy Tykes

    Step away from the hairbrush, dad!

    LOL!!

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