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The Graduate

N, The Graduate

Where does the time go? It seems that only yesterday my son, N, was a mere infant in my arms. Now he is a preschool graduate.

His school even had a graduation ceremony for all the students who were entering kindergarten next year. I find the notion of a preschool graduation to be a bit silly. It’s not like he spent four years mastering computer science or philosophy. He learned to color, write his name, and play nicely with others. What’s the big deal?

I quickly discovered that it is a big deal – to mothers. My wife, K, was ecstatic that her little boy was graduating from preschool. I managed to tamp down her enthusiasm before she could order fancy invitations or plan a huge graduation soiree. Her excitement waned further when she realized that she had a commitment that conflicted with the ceremony.

I knew that it was up to me to carry the banner in my wife’s absence. Although she was upset that she wouldn’t be there, she intended to make the most of my attendance.

“N’s teacher sent some very detailed instructions,” she said as she handed me a card. “Read that and make sure you follow them to the letter.”

I read the card and wondered if K was playing a trick on me. The card read:
Drop off your student at his/her classroom by 6:40 p.m. We will show a slideshow in the auditorium at 6:30 p.m.

“Is that it?” I asked. “The instructions seem pretty simple to me.” She gave me a glare that she usually reserves for the children when they are misbehaving.

“And by that, I meant ‘Yes, dear,” I responded. I’m no fool.

On the night of the graduation, I rushed home to get N fed and dressed. Searching for his graduation outfit, I discovered a suit that I bought him last Christmas.

“Put this on,” I said and went to my bedroom to change clothes. When N came into the room, he was beaming with joy. He always wants to wear a suit so he can look like Daddy. Unfortunately, the suit was too big and engulfed his tiny frame.

“That’s not going to work,” I told him. His smile turned sour. “Don’t look so sad. Daddy will find you a something to wear that will make you the best looking boy at the graduation.”

We finally settled on his Easter outfit – a trouser and vest combination purchased by his grandparents. I grabbed a tie to complete his look.

“I don’t want to wear a tie,” he complained.

“Why not?” I asked.

“I just don’t want to.”

“What’s the reason?”

He looked down at his feet and then replied. “Because all of the other boys will laugh at me.”

“But Daddy’s wearing a tie and no one is laughing at him,” I said. “Don’t you want to be cool like Daddy?”

He thought about it for a minute and then smiled. “Okay, I’ll wear a tie, but I want the red one because the striped one looks funny.”

“Okay. Wear the read one,” I said. “Now put on your shoes so we can go.”

“Do I get to wear my tap dance shoes?” he asked.

“What tap dance shoes?”

“You know,” he said. “The black shoes you bought me.”

“Those aren’t tap dance shoes,” I corrected. “Those are dress shoes, but feel free to tap dance in them if you’d like.”

After we were dressed, I drove us to the school and delivered N to his classroom at precisely 6:25 p.m. (that’s for K’s benefit). On each student’s desk sat a graduation cap made out of construction paper. N raced inside to try on his cap.

With N in his teacher’s custody, I went to the auditorium to watch the slide show. I was disappointed to see only four photos of N during the 30 minute presentation. K pre-ordered the DVD. I knew she would be disappointed too.

At 7 p.m., the kids marched into the auditorium and were ushered to their seats. The school’s director said a few words and then started calling each class to the stage. Although there were about 12 classes, the process moved quickly.

As the children traipsed across the stage, I noticed some of the mothers were weeping (see earlier point about being a big deal for moms). Several of the dads were down front jockeying for camera and camcorder positions. When N’s class was called to the stage, I jumped into the fray.

N walked across the stage with an air of confidence. Since I was his only family member in attendance, I couldn’t match the whoops and hollers that some of the other kids received. I doubt that my modest applause was noticed by anyone. Regardless, I was proud of my son’s accomplishment. I’m glad that I was there to support him.

The ceremony concluded with the children singing their school song followed immediately by a reception. N and I grabbed some cookies and punch and headed home.

N couldn’t wait to show his mother his diploma which read:

This certifies that N has completed the preschool course of study at Wee Wuns Weekday Ministries and is therefore entitled to this Preschool Diploma. Given on this date: May 27, 2009.

K studied the diploma carefully and begged for a summary of the ceremony.

“The director called N’s class to the stage,” I said. “Then each student walked across to receive his or her diploma.”

“No, no,” she demanded. “I need details.”

“I gave you all the details,” I said. “That’s all that happened. It’s a preschool graduation not a college commencement.” I got the look again.

Luckily, N saved me from imminent death. He placed his cap on his head, grabbed his diploma and proudly stated. “Now I’m ready for college.” K and I laughed.

“Let’s just prepare for kindergarten right now,” I said.

It won’t be too long before he will be going off to college, getting married, moving away, and having a family of his own. But for now, he is my preschool graduate and I will savor this moment in time.

Stay Strong,

 

P.S. – I’d love to hear about your preschool graduation experiences.

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  • http://www.momofali.com Momo Fali

    Aw! He’s adorable! You should savor this, because once they start elementary school time just starts running together and it flies right past you. My daughter started kindergarten a few days ago and in September she’ll be in 5th grade.

  • http://www.momofali.com Momo Fali

    Aw! He’s adorable! You should savor this, because once they start elementary school time just starts running together and it flies right past you. My daughter started kindergarten a few days ago and in September she’ll be in 5th grade.

  • http://www.mamistimeout.com Jai

    That was so sweet. Time sure does fly. My son is only 2 but preschool is right around the corner. He is adorable!

  • http://www.mamistimeout.com Jai

    That was so sweet. Time sure does fly. My son is only 2 but preschool is right around the corner. He is adorable!

  • http://www.momfiles.com Sheliza

    What a great story! It seems that pre-school graduation is the thing now. I don’t recall ever having anything like that many years ago. You’ve got quite an amazing little fella there. Congrats to your family :)

  • http://www.momfiles.com Sheliza

    What a great story! It seems that pre-school graduation is the thing now. I don’t recall ever having anything like that many years ago. You’ve got quite an amazing little fella there. Congrats to your family :)

  • Madame Primadanna

    Your blogs are getting funnier and better…Really loved this piece….Tell N congratulations on this great accomplishments and many more to come!!!! Give Mommy K a break….I have been in her shoes many times and it is difficult for a mom to miss out on these major milestones in her child(ren) life/lives!!! We do feel fortunate to have husbands/father of our child(ren) that are such good dads/husbands to help us….

  • Madame Primadanna

    Your blogs are getting funnier and better…Really loved this piece….Tell N congratulations on this great accomplishments and many more to come!!!! Give Mommy K a break….I have been in her shoes many times and it is difficult for a mom to miss out on these major milestones in her child(ren) life/lives!!! We do feel fortunate to have husbands/father of our child(ren) that are such good dads/husbands to help us….

  • http://latinaonamission.com/blog Ms. Latina

    Congrats to N!

    As a mom I made a big deal of it so that my sons could see how important school was. It made them want to do better in school. Having someone rooting for you even when its considered a “small” achievement is the greatest motivator for young and old!

    Good job with the “yes, dear” ;)

  • http://latinaonamission.com/blog Ms. Latina

    Congrats to N!

    As a mom I made a big deal of it so that my sons could see how important school was. It made them want to do better in school. Having someone rooting for you even when its considered a “small” achievement is the greatest motivator for young and old!

    Good job with the “yes, dear” ;)

  • http://www.paddedroomfor1.blogspot.com head_nut

    Great post! The Boy is starting Kindergarten next year as well. Their pre-school didn’t do a graduation. They did do a year end program though.

  • http://www.paddedroomfor1.blogspot.com head_nut

    Great post! The Boy is starting Kindergarten next year as well. Their pre-school didn’t do a graduation. They did do a year end program though.

  • Candance

    What I like most was your son’s prouncement, “Now I’m ready for college!” Having two boys our own, 4 and 2, my husband and I instill in them the importance of education. To hear them, and their playmates, discuss their future plans–you know the fire/policemen, doctor/lawyer, discussion, is awesome.

    I love Dad blogs like yours and others I’ve discovered. Hearing your perspective, adds a richness to the institution called parenting!

  • Candance

    What I like most was your son’s prouncement, “Now I’m ready for college!” Having two boys our own, 4 and 2, my husband and I instill in them the importance of education. To hear them, and their playmates, discuss their future plans–you know the fire/policemen, doctor/lawyer, discussion, is awesome.

    I love Dad blogs like yours and others I’ve discovered. Hearing your perspective, adds a richness to the institution called parenting!

  • http://www.Halushki.com Jozet at Halushki

    Oh my goodness! TOO CUTE! What an adorable guy!

    And you know you need to get him tap shoes now. All the kids in Kindergarten are wearing them. ;-)

  • http://www.Halushki.com Jozet at Halushki

    Oh my goodness! TOO CUTE! What an adorable guy!

    And you know you need to get him tap shoes now. All the kids in Kindergarten are wearing them. ;-)

  • http://blog.candelariasilva.com Can-Can

    What a great story. I have friends who have told me of some people who’ve gone over-board on pre-school graduations (incuding limos – I kid you not), however, I think marking transitions are important and having this graduation be one of the line of graduations you and he expect him to attend is great. He’s so cute and proud in that photo. There is such “father-hunger” among so many kids – your son is a very lucky boy!

  • http://blog.candelariasilva.com Can-Can

    What a great story. I have friends who have told me of some people who’ve gone over-board on pre-school graduations (incuding limos – I kid you not), however, I think marking transitions are important and having this graduation be one of the line of graduations you and he expect him to attend is great. He’s so cute and proud in that photo. There is such “father-hunger” among so many kids – your son is a very lucky boy!

  • http://singledadstory.blogspot.com/ Thomas

    Yeah I didn’t get it either but my wife at the time was elated. Congrats on the graduation, you handled everything with the confidence a father should have.

  • http://singledadstory.blogspot.com/ Thomas

    Yeah I didn’t get it either but my wife at the time was elated. Congrats on the graduation, you handled everything with the confidence a father should have.

  • http://www.rebekahskillen.com Rebekah

    You son is just TOOOOOO cute for words! I can’t wait to start a family and experience pre-K graduation! I think you did a great job as Dad and Mom at the graduation- You truly are learning how to communicate with the fairer sex- keep it up! I am sure the men reading you blog are taking notes!

  • http://www.rebekahskillen.com Rebekah

    You son is just TOOOOOO cute for words! I can’t wait to start a family and experience pre-K graduation! I think you did a great job as Dad and Mom at the graduation- You truly are learning how to communicate with the fairer sex- keep it up! I am sure the men reading you blog are taking notes!

  • http://theartis6.blogspot.com Courtney

    So far I have missed 2 of my little ones graduation due to being hospitalized while pregnant. How I managed to be pregnant and hospitalized is my husband’s fault. And like your wife I had to depend on my husband for details. After the first graduation he came back with very few details, so from now on he is required to video tape all events I am unable to attend. He’s happy, and so am I. Did your son get a cake that said congrats? Every milestone is worth celebrating, you only get them once!

  • http://theartis6.blogspot.com Courtney

    So far I have missed 2 of my little ones graduation due to being hospitalized while pregnant. How I managed to be pregnant and hospitalized is my husband’s fault. And like your wife I had to depend on my husband for details. After the first graduation he came back with very few details, so from now on he is required to video tape all events I am unable to attend. He’s happy, and so am I. Did your son get a cake that said congrats? Every milestone is worth celebrating, you only get them once!

  • http://blackfamilyblog.com Lester Spence

    I just wrote a post asking whether I should care that my son gradates from fifth grade today. Thanks for another perspective. I haven’t missed any of my kids “graduations” and don’t plan to. I’ll be in the stands giving polite applause too.

  • http://blackfamilyblog.com Lester Spence

    I just wrote a post asking whether I should care that my son gradates from fifth grade today. Thanks for another perspective. I haven’t missed any of my kids “graduations” and don’t plan to. I’ll be in the stands giving polite applause too.

  • Sam-I-Am

    He is so handsome you’ll have to beat the girls off of him soon.
    I too have attended a graduation, but not for my own child for my god daughter. I was the proud parent that day sporting the whistle and the camera. I think it is important for parents especially African American parents to stay involved in our childrens lives especially when it comes to their education.
    I’m glad that you are fully involved with your children regardless of how minute or grand the celebration may be.
    Congrats! Once again:-)

  • Sam-I-Am

    He is so handsome you’ll have to beat the girls off of him soon.
    I too have attended a graduation, but not for my own child for my god daughter. I was the proud parent that day sporting the whistle and the camera. I think it is important for parents especially African American parents to stay involved in our childrens lives especially when it comes to their education.
    I’m glad that you are fully involved with your children regardless of how minute or grand the celebration may be.
    Congrats! Once again:-)

  • Sam-I-Am

    Aww he is a cutie patootie!

    I myself am going to a graduation for my god daughter and will have my whistle and camera in tow. I love it when parents are involved with every aspect of their child..especially an African American father at that(pop ya collar yes indeed).

    And you tell him yes he is ready for college and when he gets there hopefully he gets a chance to see all these blogs of how proud he looked becoming a successful man himself.

  • Sam-I-Am

    Aww he is a cutie patootie!

    I myself am going to a graduation for my god daughter and will have my whistle and camera in tow. I love it when parents are involved with every aspect of their child..especially an African American father at that(pop ya collar yes indeed).

    And you tell him yes he is ready for college and when he gets there hopefully he gets a chance to see all these blogs of how proud he looked becoming a successful man himself.

  • http://www.momspeacebites.blogspot.com LaVender

    Darn right, it’s a big deal!! We homeschool, but I have to admit I even cried when firstborn started the first grade (lol). He’s going to public high school next year and I’m ALREADY tearing up about it. My baaaaby! It’s nice to visit your blog; you’re a great father figure.

  • http://www.momspeacebites.blogspot.com LaVender

    Darn right, it’s a big deal!! We homeschool, but I have to admit I even cried when firstborn started the first grade (lol). He’s going to public high school next year and I’m ALREADY tearing up about it. My baaaaby! It’s nice to visit your blog; you’re a great father figure.

  • http://eyesofbabes.wordpress.com Joshua

    I missed my daughter’s pre-school graduation and feel horrible. It didn’t seem that imporant at the time and I would have gone had I been able, but after the fact, it seems like something I should have attended. You can read the story on my blog. http://eyesofbabes.wordpress.com/2009/06/01/nobel-prize/

  • http://eyesofbabes.wordpress.com Joshua

    I missed my daughter’s pre-school graduation and feel horrible. It didn’t seem that imporant at the time and I would have gone had I been able, but after the fact, it seems like something I should have attended. You can read the story on my blog. http://eyesofbabes.wordpress.com/2009/06/01/nobel-prize/

  • http://eyesmindheart.blogspot.com 2sweetnsaxy

    What a cutie. I don’t have any children so I delight in the joy of my now grown nephew and his little ones. They’re such characters. I can sit back and shake my head at parents and the big deal they make over the littlest things and at the same time feeling my heart warm because I know I would do the same. Children are God’s gift and I pray for them often. There are so many out there who desperately need them. So as I shake my head at all you parents making so much of nothing (LOL!) I thank God for parents like you who so obviously love your children and I happily gobble up every word of your loving stories. Thank you for sharing them. :-)

  • http://eyesmindheart.blogspot.com 2sweetnsaxy

    What a cutie. I don’t have any children so I delight in the joy of my now grown nephew and his little ones. They’re such characters. I can sit back and shake my head at parents and the big deal they make over the littlest things and at the same time feeling my heart warm because I know I would do the same. Children are God’s gift and I pray for them often. There are so many out there who desperately need them. So as I shake my head at all you parents making so much of nothing (LOL!) I thank God for parents like you who so obviously love your children and I happily gobble up every word of your loving stories. Thank you for sharing them. :-)

  • http://ehaggins.blogspot.com Erica

    Of course it’s a big deal every step they take further from being our babies and becoming more independent and grown is a big deal. Very handsome young man by the way. :)

  • http://ehaggins.blogspot.com Erica

    Of course it’s a big deal every step they take further from being our babies and becoming more independent and grown is a big deal. Very handsome young man by the way. :)

  • Anonymous

    awww so cute! i totally understand about the moms crying. my kids never went to preschool. my son had a kindergarten grad ceremony, and a mom made 2 caps & gowns so that each kid could get a pic in them. the pics were great.

    i’m gonna be crying this wednesday when my 14 yo daughter graduates from 8th grade and becomes an official high school student. o_O i’ve been through this before, but with my son it was different. is it different because it’s a daughter? probably so. i love that your kiddo says he’s ready for college. it’s good to know he’s already planning his future :o )

  • http://twitter.com/annedoggett annette doggett

    How cute!  Brings back good memories!  Both of my sons graduated this year as well.  My oldest from college and my youngest from high school!

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