Comments on: Authentic Manhood

By: Gregory Lewis

Gregory Lewis — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 16:21:16 +0000

I’ve been there, Mocha Dad. In a month or so, I will go back to my Old ‘hood for two weeks. I will run into my homies — the ones who are not dead or not in jail. I haven’t been back for 5 years. I am looking forward to it right now, But I know I will get the blues seeing my brothers who never got out, never grew up or never did anything with their lives.

By: Ms. Latina

Ms. Latina — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 16:43:55 +0000

You sound like a wonderful father. Sadly not all kids have that option and although I totally agree with the fact that fathers are very important in a child’s life (I have two boys myself) I have to add that it also depends on the TYPE of father. If its a man like Vando then it would be best to exclude him from their lives as it could cause more disruption in their lives. Yet they still need a father-figure. Thankfully I have been blessed with some wonderful men in my life but not all women are as lucky and those women should be applauded for doing the best that they can! As a poster above said, single moms, whether by choice or not, have the power to raise good men so that they in turn can become the fathers they did not have!

Thank you for being so open in your posts.
Ms. Latina

By: Al_Pal

Al_Pal — Thu, 28 May 2009 21:25:01 +0000

WOW. Great post. Very… intense and touching, I guess. I’m so glad you’re teaching your son well. ;p

Here via Daddy Dan.

& yeah… doesn’t necessarily have to be the father, but boys need a stable male force in their lives, for sure.

By: Turf Dad

Turf Dad — Thu, 28 May 2009 17:57:33 +0000

Great post Mocha Dad. Both parents are such a big influence on their children. We have to set examples. Perferably good ones. I wince every time my kids do something “not so good” and I know they probably learned it from me.

By: Wifey

Wifey — Wed, 27 May 2009 23:01:05 +0000

Wow. I remember the Vando’s and Vandette’s in my neighborhood and shutter at the thought of my kids having to deal with them.

Great, powerful post.

Winks & Smiles,
Wifey

By: KathyB!

KathyB! — Wed, 27 May 2009 17:44:20 +0000

This is truly an inspiring story. Somehow, I think your kids are going to do just fine. You know way too much to let them go wrong.

By: ~Y

~Y — Tue, 26 May 2009 12:30:16 +0000

What a frightening story. But there really are men (and women) like that in this world. Its a Blessing that your children have a role model in their lives such as yourself. But i know there are many children who dont, and all we can do is come together as a community and do what we can to hep out. Sad.

By: Michael Garcia-Beard

Michael Garcia-Beard — Mon, 25 May 2009 05:04:06 +0000

I must say I am a stay at home Black father of mixed race children and I cannot agree with you more. If it wasn’t for my father I know for a fact that I would have turned out the way I did. It is very important to show your sons how a man is supposed to act.

By: Stesha

Stesha — Sat, 23 May 2009 19:31:05 +0000

My husband and I were discussing this topic last night. As the parents of 4 boys, we would like for them not to look their “friends” for guidance, but to us. This world we live in now is so complicated for adults, we can only imagine what the children encounter.

Hugs and Mocha,
Stesha

By: WeaselMomma

WeaselMomma — Sat, 23 May 2009 12:23:54 +0000

This was excellent. I too grew up ‘in the hood’ and have since escaped to build a life for myself and raise my children in the burbs. There are pros and cons to the life lessons learned in each place, but I think I definitely have an easier job than my parents did.