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What Not to Wear

by Mocha Dad · 11 comments

When did it become acceptable for little girls to dress like hookers? I am outraged at our society’s attempts to sexualize our daughters. I don’t blame the advertisers or manufacturers who sell this stuff. I blame the parents – especially the fathers. As dads we must protect our daughters’ innocence. We cannot turn a blind eye or think it’s cute when our little girls dress provocatively. We have to teach them that sexy does not equal beautiful and that modesty is a virtue.

My wife and I have a hard time finding modest clothes for my 7-year-old daughter, Nee. It seems that everything is cut tight and short. Things have gotten so out of control that we even have to censor Nee’s Barbie Doll’s clothing because we don’t want Barbie giving her any ideas.

I really like what Michael Hyatt had to say in his blog post, “Whatever Happened to Modesty.” In the post, he outlined Four Guidelines for Modesty that I would like to share:

1. If you have trouble getting into it or out of it, it is probably not modest.
2. If you have to be careful when you sit down or bend over, it is probably not modest.
3. If people look at any part of your body before looking at your face, it is probably not modest.
4. If you can see your most private body parts or an outline of those parts under the fabric, it is probably not modest.

And don’t even get me started on this year’s Halloween costumes. Sexy Halloween costumes are inappropriate for young girls. Period! Here are a few of the costumes that I found online that are highly inappropriate: Army Brat, Leprechaun, Pink Maid, Sweetie Fairy Child, B. Witched, Goldee Locks. These are not the types of outfits that little girls should wear when they are walking up to strangers’ houses at night asking for candy.

As fathers, we have to be more aware of the way our daughter’s dress and guide them towards dressing appropriately. Males are visual creatures and can be aroused just as easily by a skimpily dressed 12-year-old as they can by a grown woman. Think about that the next time you allow your daughter to leave the house with a bare midriff and mini skirt.

Stay Strong,

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

James October 29, 2008 at 3:22 pm

Great post. You are right on, and I find it astounding what some parents let thier young girls wear.

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JNez October 29, 2008 at 4:15 pm

i tend to agree with your assertions here. as the father of 3 daughters, i face similar challenges. but at least it’s winter now so clothing is designed to keep them warm & covered up. but once spring hits, all bets are off.

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Dee October 29, 2008 at 4:45 pm

ITA with you. We attended a Halloween party at my kids’ school last week and a girl was dressed as “Pretty Woman”. Makeup, halter top, mini skirt and knee high patent leather boots. It was shocking, and disgusting.

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aly October 29, 2008 at 7:09 pm

I actually do blame the advertisers. Why? Because it’s intentional to get folks to buy stuff they probably wouldn’t have had they not been marketed too (targeted). TeLIEvision, radio, internet, all multi media. I mean why even make and manufacture “adult” clothing and pawn it off in the kids section?

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Stephanie October 29, 2008 at 8:10 pm

I couldn’t agree with you more on this issue. I find it more amazing every day how numb people are to the provocative way that little girls dress. I’ve even had arguments with members of my own family (my husband’s too) because I’ve had to return/refuse some gifts (clothing) that really don’t support the way that I want my daughters to dress/see them themselves. No one thinks about the messages that are attached to the clothes. THERE ARE MESSAGES – be sure you’re sending the right ones.

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Jenya October 31, 2008 at 12:41 pm

I have two teenage daughters and I let them dress how they want to. A woman should be able to wear the clothes she likes without people making judgements about them or thinking they are easy sexual targets. I’m tired of men like you who try to control women’s bodies.

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.elle denise. November 3, 2008 at 5:28 am

Say it again…

I usually tread lightly on this subject, b/c I’m not a parent.

However!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate seeing little girls looking like “who done it”. Then again, when their mother’s dress like video vixens & their fathers dress like gangbangers, I’m not surprised. I have a niece, nephew & a slew of Godchildren. I’d snatch them up for dressing inappropriately. Just because they make it in their size, doesn’t mean you have to buy it. But you know, some people think its “cute”. I think its sad.

My people, my people…

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Carol November 3, 2008 at 8:07 am

I am right there with you on this topic! I have a teenager who has been through two homecoming dances and each time there is at least one girl who is wearing a highly inappropriate dress.

Last year there was a 14 year old in a dress so low cut that I’m not sure I would be completely comfortable in it. This year a 17 year old was wearing one that was cut too low in the front, had a slit entirely too high and was open on both sides so low that you had to wonder if she was able to wear underwear. Her mom thought it was the most beautiful dress that she had seen and everyone else that sees my pictures makes a derogatory comment. If ours had come home with that dress, her dad and I both would have told her to take it back!

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.elle denise. November 3, 2008 at 8:46 am

…and another thing that shocked me, 1 day in Target; THONGS & BOYSHORTS for little girls. I was floored & had to leave the section.

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MissJay November 13, 2008 at 8:22 pm

I hate to say it but youg girls dressing like that leads to statutory rape. They dress too old for their age, then get that attention from grown men. Then they find out they like it, one thing leasd to another. I think it’s sad. Like Janet said (a long time ago) “that’s the state of the world today”.

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KathyB! April 7, 2009 at 11:17 am

This is a constant struggle. I have four girls (11,9,7,7) and once they outgrow the baby/toddler section it goes straight to pieces (purely from a clothing perspective!). The balance between letting them express themselves and maintaining their modesty is tough. Fortunately, my girls seem to “get it.” I’m curious to see how it goes in another couple years.

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